I get to

Years ago I remember hearing this distinction, or reframe, which shifted me from thinking “I have to” to a more enthusiastic, “I get to.”

It’s been pretty powerful for me in my life, and can take a situation where I may be feeling a bit resentful to a more empowered place of gratitude.

The example I first heard was something similar to saying, “I have to clean the house” and changing that to “I get to clean the house.”

It’s such a subtle but powerful change.

It takes you from being a victim to being empowered. From a place of frustration or resentment to gratitude.

When we “get” to do something, we feel good about it, we’re at choice, we are empowered. 

I “get” to is also gratitude based, meaning, I get to because I have a home, I get to because I have the time, I get to because I take pride in my space. And on the flip side of that – some people don’t have a home to clean and would love to, or perhaps they don’t have the time or don’t even care about their surroundings.

It’s a really great reframe regarding kids as well, especially during stressful times. One day my kids won’t be living with me, and I know those little things that may irritate me now, will be missed later. I believe it’s such an honour and a blessing to have kids, so instead, I choose to think, “I get to put away that dish that was left on the counter, I get to turn off the forgotten light, I get to unload the dishwasher…”

Catch yourself anytime you say you have to do something, and try on the “I get to” and see how that feels instead.